angryraidleader.com

Don’t DIAF. For those of you who aren’t up on all of the cool gamer lingo, DIAF means Die in a Fire. It’s something you say to people you don’t like. It’s also something to be avoided when raiding. Almost all fights consist of two things:

1. Do your job.

2. Don’t die in the fire.

The ‘fire’ can take on many forms. Cleave, Charred Earth, Rain of Fire, Infernals, Arcane Explosion, Death and Decay. What it means is, don’t take damage that you can avoid. This requires a skill that is rare among raiders, being able to walk and do other stuff. I’m starting to believe that most people that play WoW are shut ins not because they are nerdy social misfits, but because if they walked out of their house they would collapse because they forgot to breathe.

Those of us that have the skill just stare at the rest of you in confusion. Why don’t you move? How do you not notice that you are taking damage? Healers, I know you’ve got to watch health bars, but last time I checked, casting a healing spell didn’t disable your mouse or movement keys. Guess what raid leaders watch in addition to a dozen other things? Health bars! It helps to know who is alive, dead, or soon to be when you’re calling a boss fight. And yet I still manage to get away from the volcano that you’re humping like it’s a drunk prom date. And what does every healer say when you yell at them for being immobile. “I was healing the tank!” Yeah without that one spell he would have died, you saved the day Captain Awesome. So how much are you healing right now? While you’re dead.

To be fair I should point out that when a dpser dies it’s even more retarded. You don’t get to blame it on health bars. Your play consists of hammering one or two keys over and over until the boss is dead. I use the 3 button with the occasional 4 myself. And yet when that AOE drops on your head what do you do? Do you use any of your ‘Oh shit’ abilities, like Iceblock or Cloak of Shadows? Do you take a quick potion or healthstone while you run out of the damage. Nope. You go – 3,3,3,3,3,3,3,3…… WTF! How did I die!?

I wonder how many times I’d have to kick you in the nuts to ensure you couldn’t reproduce.