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Blizzard announced plans this month to add new content before the release of Wrath of the Lich King which would serve to reduce the amount of gold floating around in the game. So let’s make sure I have this right. Gold sellers were a huge problem for Blizzard. They were pissing off players, disrupting the economy, and profiting off of Blizzard’s work. It takes the geniuses who run the game a couple of years to figure out that a simple way to put them out of business is to make it easier for players to get gold once they’ve reached level 70. So they add in dozens of daily quests and let us complete up to 25 of them a day. Now all the retards who couldn’t figure out how to make money can afford to buy shit. By the way, if you’ve been level 70 for like 50 days of play time and don’t have your epic flying mount, you’re one of the retards. Now don’t get upset! I wouldn’t want you trhowing a tantrum without putting your helmet on first.

Every time some dipshit that plays the game 24/7 whines about how broke he is I can’t help but wonder what you do with all of that play time. Is there some moron tax that you’re paying that I’m exempt from? I hit 70 with my first toon after Burning Crusade came out, spent a weekend farming and had my epic mount. So where does all your money go?

Back to the topic. So now you can do tons of daily quests and earn 200+ gold in a couple of hours, every day. I guess someone at Blizzard didn’t do the math. Their content patches since the release of BC (18 months ago) each amounted to a couple weeks of trying out the new stuff before it becomes boring. The arena system and increased honor gains means most people spend less time pvping than they used too. And most people can only raid so much. So what do all the addicts do? DAILYS! Oh no! Now we’ve all got too much gold! Quick, find a way to fix the economy before WotLK hits. And what did they come up with? A bag! That’s right, for the low low price of 1200 gold, you can be the proud new owner of a 22 slot bag. And they even managed to work in a pop culture reference. The vendor’s name is Haris Pilton! Get it! Paris Hilton! A big bag! Yeah, give that whore more attention. You’re so ironic. (I should point out that this is sarcasm. Because whoever thought including her would be funny should have their nuts sandblasted.) And it’s not unique! You can blow like 12000 gold and swap out all of your bags! Nevermind the fact that with the changes to gear in WotLK hybrid clases won’t need separate gear to play their off specs. Forget that Blizzard keeps increasing stack sizes and coming out with items like the potion injectors that save bag space. It’s a 22 slot bag! Woo hoo! Oh and you can also spend thousands of gold on a bunch of crap jewelry that has no stats. Hey Blizzard, just because some of your developers are dumber than a bag of rocks, it doesn’t mean your players are.

Fuck. Who am I kidding. Most of the people I meet in the game would probably pick on a bag of rocks for being smart. “Hey bag of rocks! You think you’re pretty smart don’t you?! Don’t ignore me bag! I’ll kick your ass!” Then after breaking both hands and probably one foot pounding on a bag of rocks, they’d realize that bag of rocks was just trying to fit in at school like the rest of them. Maybe bag of rocks would even help then study for their Chemistry final. And then bag of rocks would be put in for the last play of the big game against their rival school because there no one else available and he’d catch an 85 yard pass so they end up winning the big game!

I should so get a job writing after school specials.